The Reward theory of attraction says we like those who like us and give us rewarding experiences. People that really reward us are people who ask little of us in return. As an example you might feel rewarded when someone you are attracted to suddenly smiles at you. It is asking very little of you to return the smile to make that person your friend.
We learn by social interaction and when we are with someone we are attracted to we feel rewarded when those closest to us reward us with pleasant experiences instead of negative experiences.
The reward theory of attraction comes into effect when we feel attracted to those people who are similar to ourselves. Those we are attracted to may have similar interests, attitudes, values and experiences that complement our own. We feel closer to these people because they are like us mentally and often times physically.
The reward theory of attraction takes into account long relationships. When we have known someone for a long time, we feel that we can trust this friend because their is a history that is known about them and of course they know us best. We are attracted to people we can share intimate details about ourselves and have them still reward us by liking and sharing their lives with us.
People often don't go too far out of their comfort zones. If we think someone will like us we will try and become that person's friend because we believe that person will like us. The people we become closest to are in our closest social areas. We find people in our neighborhoods, schools, places of work and in close proximity to our area of living the most rewarding because they are easily accessible to us.
There are those that seek out unconventional relationships by going onto the internet and making friends online. Often people in cyberspace can be more attractive because often you cannot see them and you have to believe what they are saying is true to continue the relationship. Although their is mystery in this, often people who are males pretend they are females, and females pretending to be males. People say they are in CA but actually may be in Australia. People sometimes like to be what they are not, so it is harder to establish a relationship with someone in cyberspace who you cannot physically see.
To understand the reward theory of attraction, there has to be mutual liking, interests and the meeting of the minds, but in the end, to get closer and to be rewarded, most people will need to put a face to the words and hear the tone of voice to really become attracted to that person.
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In a rural area a farmer was tending to his horse named Buddy, and along came a stranger who despartely needed the farmer's help. The stranger had lost control of his vehicle and ran it off into a ditch. The stranger asked the farmer if his horse could somehow pull the vehicle out of the ditch for him and told the farmer that the vehicle was small.
The farmer said he would come, bring his horse, and take a look, but could not promise he could help if his horse might be injured in some way from attempting to pull the vehicle out of the ditch. The farmer did see that the stranger was correct and that the vehicle was small, so the farmer took a rope and fixed it so that his horse, Buddy, would be able to pull the vehicle out of the ditch.
The farmer then said, "Pull, Casey, Pull," but the horse would not budge.
The farmer then said, "Pull, Bailey, Pull," but the horse would not budge again.
The farmer then said, "Pull, Mandy, Pull," and again the horse would not move.
The farmer then said, "Pull, Buddy, Pull," and the horse pulled until the vehicle was out of the ditch.
The stranger was so very grateful, but asked the farmer why he called the horse by different names?
The farmer said, "Buddy is blind, and I had to make him think he had help pulling the car out of the ditch or he would not have pulled."
Lesson: don't wait on others in order to accomplish something or you may always be in a ditch. Sometimes we won't attempt to do something if we know we don't have help.
If you want something, all you have to do is ask for it. Sweeter words have never been spoken. It would be like a dream come true. But that doesn't mean it can't be true. Good things really can be yours just from asking for them.
When you know how to ask. That's the key. Knowing how to ask, and knowing what to ask for. You can ask for anything you want. But asking for a new car when you really want a Porsche, doesn't mean you'll be satisfied with just "a new car". And just saying "I want a Porsche" and then going on about your life as usual probably won't get it for you.
Focusing your thoughts on getting that new Porsche, picturing yourself driving it, truly believing you deserve it, and allowing it to come to you is the way to get it.
Just asking is only the first step in the Law of Attraction. Feeling and acting as if you've received it is the second, knowing you deserve it and allowing it to come to you is the third.
Having doubts about your worthiness produces negative energy. Negative energy produces negative results. If you don't think you deserve a new Porsche, you won't get it. If you don't think the Law of Attraction works, it won't work for you.
Positive energy is the only way to get positive results. And positive energy is only produced by positive thoughts.